Reality Roll Call

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by Lakiya Emerson

Chelsea and Mark perform an upbeat contemporary dance choreographed by Tyce. It’s a game of cat and mouse set to I’m a Woman from the revue Smokey Joe’s Cafe. Now, during their montage, Mark points out that Chelsea is sexy, despite her tomboyishness, and Chelsea reveals that she can’t spell “wrap” which she spells “w-a-r-p.” Thank goodness she isn’t competing in a spelling bee. The audience loves their performance. Nigel said her legs went on for days. Mary found it sultry, sexy and bluesy. Mia said that the dance showed Mark’s lack of technical training, though the performance was great. She said Chelsea was great and sexy, but she lacked movement…. Oh Mia. One day, your planet will converge with earth and we’ll understand what you mean.

The judges are far from impressed with Comfort and Thayne in both of their performances. The first is hip hop and the second is a contemporary routine. In their first performance, Mary says it was just good, but unexciting. Mia says they aren’t connected and that she had been pushing for Comfort, but that Comfort isn’t taking her performance to the level it needs to go. In their, contemporary routine, choreographer Mary Murphy was determined to push Comfort to step up to the plate, but Comfort doesn’t make it off of the bench. Nigel says he would have like to see another couple perform the dance. Mary broke down every technical mistake Comfort made, and Mia points out that you can only fake so much, and that Comfort is past being able to fake it. She says Thayne is brilliant and that she liked his smile, but once again, the two have no chemistry.

Jessica and Will do a contemporary routine by Tyce Diorio. It’s theme is the Garden of Eden and the connection between man and woman. Tyce tells them it must flow and look effortless and Jessica finally says she feels confident in a dance. Her confidence shows. The piece is set to this very quiet music–it’s just a woman humming—and as they flow from one movement to the next they look like Greek sculptures come to life or like a stop motion DaVinci anatomy drawing. It’s very pretty and Jessica definitely owns the choreography tonight. Nigel calls the piece extraordinary and stunning.

He said Will was incredible with his lines, and he says that Jessica is finally keeping up. He said he felt like they added a connection unlike Comfort and Thayne. Mary starts blushing, and said it was one of the most amazing pieces she’s ever seen on the show. She calls Will a dynamic technical dancer and gave Jessica kudos for stepping up to the plate. Mia said they had gone to a different place and calls the dance the perfect moving body art, like a painting with the most gorgeous pictures. She said the dance was alive and that Will reminded her of Justin Richardson. She also said it was the first time that Jessica didn’t fear a dance, but embraced it.

They’re second dance is a quick step choreographed by Toney and Meredith. It starts off with some back flips and I can’t tell if they’re stumbling or dancing. Nigel said everything was great, except for their quickstep. Mary pointed out that his jacket didn’t fit properly and wasn’t made for dancing in. Indeed, his chest looked like it was choking. Mia said Jessica went back to her usual habits She said Will looked tired of carrying Jessica and that it was time for Will to have a new partner. My heart clenched for Jessica, but I can’t help but agree with Mia. Will, the usual gentleman that he is, tried to make Jessica feel better by saying that they’d grown together, but no one was buying that line.

Courtney and Gev, are quickly diving into old married couple territory. She suggests that he shave his chest for their performance, and he does. Then they stand in front of the judges and argue about the hair or welcome lack thereof. Their first dance is a Cha Cha to Don’t Stop The Music by Rihanna. Gev really gets into the spirit of the dance, with facial expressions and everything, Nigel said he was looking like Mick Jagger.. Surprisingly the performance wasn’t over cheesy and all the judges agree that it was a fun performance with lots of magic though not technically great. Can I pause here and point out how unfair the judges can be when a couple gets an exciting technical dance as opposed to a boring technical dance? When it’s exciting, they only talk about enjoying the performance and then forgive the dancers their mistakes, but when the dance is boring, they’ll point out every mistake from how they flex their feet to how they breathe.

Their second dance is a contemporary dance to Standing There by The Creatures. They’re dressed like some extras out of The Mummy or Indiana Jones and they dance with a a map. Gev gets to display some of his b-boy abilities with a hand stand where he claps his feet.. Nigel calls it fun and said their performance was cotton candy: no substance but fun. Mary disagrees and says it’s rough and raw and though they made it look easy. Mia says they’re one of her top couples.

Anya and Pasha choreagraph

Twitchington’s first dance is a Krump choreographed by Lil C, who oddly, looks just like Twitch. There were more than a few moments when I wasn’t sure who was who. This dance is much better than the one he did for Comfort and Chris, though I’m starting to feel like choreographed Krumping is an oxymoron—or it’s just Lil’ C. His choreography just doesn’t capture the spirit of the style of dance, in any way. If you’ve ever seen David LaChapelle’s Rize or any Missy Elliot video from three years ago then you know what I mean. Nigel says Kherington’s performance felt like. He called it a duet between Busta Rhymes and Miley Cyrus, but she said Kherington did a good job until the last 16 bars of the song when she lost energy. Mary said it was the first time on the show that she believed in Krumping. She said Kherington was a surprise. Mia called it dirty, disgusting, and really really buck (which means they did a good job). Mia said she would ignore Kherington’s loss of energy at the end. Their second dance is a smooth tango in which they’re supposed to be playing the dancing versions of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie in Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Unfortunately, no one is convinced that they are assassins out to kill each other. Twitchington’s usual chemistry is nonexistent in their performance. They’re supposed to be fighting, but there’s very little evidence of a conflict in the dance. Nigel babbled about how the fact that Twitch looked uncomfortable made him dishonest He said they murdered the dance and not each other. Mary loved the beginning and the end but said the middle wasn’t great. Mia said Twitch was stiff and didn’t get into character while Kherington was mediocre.

Katee and Joshua perform a relatively boring dance to the GooGoo Dolls’ Iris. Nigel said that Joshua was too bouncy though Katee was beautiful with clean lines. Mary said all the lifts were great, including the snake, but the execution of the dance could have been better—it should have glided instead of bouncing. Mia called their performance clumsy but that Katee was meant to dance and that she loved her. Maybe Katee will make it to the Mia planet. Their second dance is Bollywood and it is a lot of fun. They do a great job. Of course none of the judges know enough about the style of dance to be able to critique the technique so they all coo in amazement at how fun the dance was and compare it to hip hop, African, and Russian dancing. Meanwhile, Nigel takes the opportunity to make an indirect statement against the war. On that note, tomorrow two more dancers will be knocked off, so if you can’t watch, come back here.

(Click here to find out who makes it to the top 10!)