Kim Kardashian is the Guest Judge on Top Model

KIM KARDASHIAN APPEARS AS A GUEST JUDGE

The girls put their interviewing skills to the test as they interview “90210’s” Jessica Lowndes on the set of “The Insider.” The ladies are surprised to learn they must write their own scripts for their CoverGirl commercials. Kim Kardashian is this week’s guest judge.

America’s Next Top Model Axis of Evil

This week’s episode of America’s Next Top Model opens with a model war that is falling out on continental lines–it’s the U.S. versus Europe, with all the American models supposedly tired of the whining and complaining of the two European models (Elina and Marjorie).  What are they whining about? Everything. Twitchy, uncomfortable Marjorie can’t understand the concept of optimism, while Elina who hates her mother and wants to ban the use of all animal products, and maybe eventually take over the world, can’t get over her need to control her own every movement, which she says has to do with her European background. In fact the two have a very Pinky and the Brain quality about them–of course minus the joy. Perpetually sunny Samantha and Sheena are the most flumoxed by it all and at one point Sheena asks Elina (who happens to have been in the U.S. for 11 years) why she doesn’t go home if she’s so unhappy. It’s the immigration question of the ages.  In response to a clearly scripted question from producers about her feelings on Elina and Marjorie’s dissatisfaction tour, Joslyn says she doesn’t have time to worry about “immigration issues,” she’s more concerned about being kicked out this week.  And worry, she should.

In their first challenge of the evening, the girls are met with a veritable cast of fashion characters beginning with Ron and Richard Harris, the Aswirl Twins. These two delightful men show the girls how to present and sell a garment. They swirl in skirts, take them off, put them back on,  present a clutch and then surprise us with its chain handle, and make a plain ill-fitting green hat seem almost adorable. Then it’s the girl’s turn. The twins love Sheena, practically laugh at McKey, and seemed pained by Marjorie, who couldn’t even get her garment on. Once everyone has had an opportunity to practice, the colorful James St. Jamesarrives on the seen in a green head to toe bodysuit underneath a gown. He parades around a stage and a tv monitor shows that he appears to be invisible so that all that can be seen is the clothes he is wearing. The girls will be doing the same thing as invisible models for a show of duds by designer Nony Tochterman. The girls must make the clothes the star of the night, but honestly, if I’d had my way, the clothes themselves would have been invisible. They were particularly horrendous. Elena, wearing a short purple dress with one long flowing sleeve walks on the stage and waves her sleeved arm in the air. Joslyn, wearing a long purple dress that is belted at the waist, takes off her belt and shimmies it behind her neck. Sheena who has on a long red dress with tiers of ruffles can’t think of anything to do  but swirl. She looks like she might swirl off stage. Marjorie’s dress, which is long, multicolored with horizontal stripes, falls down to her waist, so on screen she looks like an half-naked invisible lady. She feels humiliated. In the end, Elina wins the challenge and her prize is a spread in the holiday accessories spread  in the December issue of Seventeen Magazine. She picks Marjorie to come along and the two have a great time.

Back at the house, the girls are seething at the fact that Elina won the prize, especialliy since apparently she doesn’t believe in Christmas. When Marjorie and Elina return, Sheena takes Elina to task, basically calling her a hypocrite and saying she didn’t deserve to do the shoot. “How can you sell something you don’t believe in,” Sheena asks. But I guess she forgot that that is the difference between mediocre and exceptional models. She then calls the girls evil.

The next day, Cycle 10 winner Whitney, shows up to tell the girls that they will be doing the now infamous Covergirl commerical. But in this year’s shoot, the girls will be using a teleprompter. Joslyn became sick on set, but still managed to give a half decent performance. Analiegh gave the best performance, looking the most natural, and moving across the set as if she knew exactly what she was doing. Marjorie’s twitchiness made her look like a chicken, which Ms. J hilariously demonstrated during the panel. Sheena  toned down her inner hood girl just a bit and managed to impress the director who said she was the best at moving across the set. Elina was controlled and cold as usual. McKey was as awkward as Marjorie. Samantha was unmemorable.

In the panel, Tyra has the girls walk in a pair of clogs and poor Samantha is the only one who falls, though she does it off stage.Tyra then tells the girls that they need to learn how to walk in clogs becasue they’ll be going to Amsterdam. The girls squeal in delight until Tyra says, “But not all of you will go.” All I could think was gee wizz, Tyra, because even my heart dropped at that one. After the judges deliberate, Analiegh gets the first photo and Sheena gets second runner up while Joslyn and Elina are the last two to be called. In the end, Joslyn’s ability to work through her illness did not win her any extra points and Elina was able to squeak by.