Evel Dick Donato Gives Us Hope for the future of Big Brother 11

No one is happy about the way this season of  Big Brother 11 turned out. I like Jordan, but let’s be honest; right now it looks like the final two will be Kevin and Natalie. Natalie was not likable from the start, but Kevin was kind of quiet in the house for the first few weeks, so the only thing I disliked about him was his fashion sense. What’s with the haircut? It’s like he told his barber to cut racing stripes into his head.

But, despite the nasty remarks he’s made recently, I think outside of the house Kevin is probably a nice guy. Natalie, on the other hand, I’m not too sure about. She has displayed absolutely no redeeming qualities since she has been in the house. In a lot of ways, she’s like a female Jessie. Except, she is totally devoid of a sense of humor, and the ability to have a normal conversation with another person. Which makes her worse than Jessie.

But Evel Dick Donato from Big Brother 8 says that there may in fact be hope for us all. He writes in his MySpace blog:

Big Announcement….

The final three is so f***ing horrible this year that they are going to have a triple eviction and tell them all to kill themselves, that they suck, America hates them (except Jordan, but she won’t understand anyhow) and that they are replacing them with myself, JP, MB & DR. That way at least someone might watch the final episodes and give a f**k what happens.

But CBS will have something to say today….
Listen for it and watch thurs

Can Big Brother 11 Save Itself From the Impending Crash and Burn?

Big Brother 11 Heads Towards the Worst Ending Ever

We are at the point in the Big Brother season where I usually write my “Player’s Fatal Mistakes” piece. You know, the one where I review each house guest that’s been evicted to date and tell you where I think they sealed their fate. I’m not doing that this year.

One of  reasons there will be no “Player’s Fatal Mistakes” is because the set up of the game  in the early part of this season excluded certain people from eviction for the week. If a member of your clique won Head of Household, you were safe as well. It worked well when it saved people from being evicted for personal reasons instead of game play. It worked poorly when it saved underhanded game players from the fate they deserved.

But each Big Brother season is an experiment. Each season there is a theme that changes the rules of what is essentially a human chess game. CBS doesn’t know how the game will shake out in the end, or if the house guests will find a glitch in the game that can change it fundamentally (like the “six finger” plan made up by Nakomis in season 5, which later came to be known as “back dooring”). The entertainment  factor of Big Brother is based on the fundamentals of all competition reality shows: rules + personalities = good ratings.

And up until  last Thursday,  the ratings for Big Brother have been greatly assisted by the personalities of some of the house guests this season. Despite whatever Ronnie thought about his game play, viewers saw that he was playing too hard too soon, and honestly couldn’t get far in the game because of his strategic errors and social handicap. He would have been evicted much sooner were it not for the protection of the clique. We couldn’t wait to see him get his.

Jessie’s power in the house was really an illusion. He automatically had a built in alliance because of his clique, and others who clung to him did so because he came in as Head of Household and a former player. He was still the arrogant  meathead he was last season, and to make matters worse he showed the kind of man he was in his interactions with Lydia and Natalie. We watched to see if either of the women would wise up.

Chima’s brand of mean-spirited, man-hating, crazy added a big boost to the ratings. We knew it couldn’t last, but we hung in there to see how far her destructive personality would take her. And Lydia. The thing about Lydia’s personality in the game is that sometimes she was funny, and occasionally she had moments of clarity. Sometimes I wanted to pat her on head and say, “you poor thing; get some help.” And sometimes I wanted to throw a bucket of ice water on her and tell her to get a grip.

Everyone else, including  Russell, was kind of a throwaway. Russell played hard, and was a great competitor. And I thought he was cute, cauliflower ears aside. But I really didn’t miss him when he left. And I knew I wouldn’t miss Michelle, but she played a good game.

I could say how much I enjoyed Jeff and Jordan as a showmance, and Jeff as game player and a hottie, but I would be saying what most people are saying out there. Let me just say this, because it has been driving me crazy for weeks: TECHNOTRONIC is a proper noun. Doesn’t anyone remember the song, “Pump Up the Jam”? The  performers derived their name from the music genre known as “techno”.

But Russell screamed and screamed about technotronic not being a word. And sadly, in America these days the rule is that if you scream loud and long enough about something, it must be true.

But I digress. The bottom line is that once Jeff was voted out, America knew the face of the game was going to be ugly.  I don’t know what the ratings were for Big Brother last night, but I  could only bear to watch ten minutes of the show. We knew Michelle was going to get the boot, and Jordan can’t really hold her own.

Which leaves us with the possibility of a final two that actually make Maggie and Ivette of season 6 look popular. Evel Dick of Big Brother 8 sums the situation up in words that mirror my sentiment:

“The final three is so f***ing horrible this year that they are going to have a triple eviction and tell them all to kill themselves…”

It might boost ratings.

Evel Dick and Janelle Pick Up Where House Calls Leaves Off

Two Big Brother Favorites Team Up for Their Own Online Show

Those of you who looked forward to House Calls, the internet talk show  that featured Gretchen Massey, Evel Dick and the week’s current Big Brother eviction, are probably disappointed that it has been canceled. But not to worry, there will still be a Big Brother internet show, featuring Big Brother winner Evel Dick Donato and Janelle. He writes about it on his current MySpace blog:

I will be doing my weekly webcast for Real Player again this year.

RealPlayer Superpass has given me my own tab in their browser, which will closely link my website and my myspace etc… They have been great to work with and our relationship is solid.

I have some fun guests lined up and we will be out on locations more this season, we will also have more past houseguests….
The viewers were out in huge numbers for the show last year and I don’t see any reason why that would change.

But I will also be doing a weekly webcast with Janelle to fill the void left by the Cancellation of Housecalls.

It will be a call in show that will talk about the feeds and anything and everything else going on in the house and being talked about on the internet.

I will be in studio while Janelle will be in NYC, but will be as good as sitting next to me co-hosting the show (well, as good as for you people, but I am getting jipped.)

We will also be doing a “He said, She said” type blog or column.

Where one week I will start off by writing my summary/thoughts/opinion on the happenings of the week in the Big Brother house. I will send it to Janelle where she will then write her opinion/feelings/thoughts about MY writings. It will come back to me, where I will write my thoughts on her response, then back to her.

The next week she will start.
I will respond.
She will respond to my response.
I will respond and wrap it for the week.

Ok, did you follow that? lol…

Basically we both comment twice.
We will take turns starting it off every week.

EvelDick talks about his tv pilot

For those of you who have been following the post-Big Brother 8 pursuits of winner Dick Donato, you know that he does a podcast on RealNetworks, and that he is pitching a reality tv show called “EvelDick Behind Bars“.

Now, if I were pitching a show called EvelDick Behind Bars, I would  have E.D. live for three days with petty criminals in a secure halfway house, competing for a $50,000. His job would be to try to drive the contestants to the brink of tears or attempted assault, and the contestant who is left in the house after three days wins. If they all break down, he wins the money.

His idea is more civilized that that, fortunately. In his words:

The pilot I shot “EvelDick Behind Bars” has been received very well by the industry people involved and that will be pitching the show to the networks. Fifteen meetings with fifteen different networks have been scheduled over the next month and everyone is excited about the show. And the actors strike couldn’t have come at a better time, now they will be looking for more reality based shows for their schedules.

If you are behind on all of this, the show is like kitchen nightmares, but it will be me and not Chef Ramsey, and it will be in bars and clubs across the country, not in restaurants.

The stars and planets are aligning and it seems as I am on the way to having my own show soon. So, keep your middle fingers up and wish me fuck (which is way better than luck) and I could be pissing you off on TV again soon.

EvelDick’s Post Big Brother 10 Finale Interviews With Dan, Memphis, Libra & Renny

Big Brother 8 winner EvelDick Donato interviews with Memphis, Dan, Renny and Libra.

Dan vs The Donatos in Big Brother 8? It Could Have Been

Picture this: it’s summer 2007, and Big Brother 8 is going full steam. Daniele Donato is winning more competitions than the law allows, Amber is somewhere crying about life in general, and Evel Dick is raising hell. And Dan Gheesling is America’s Player, squirting mustard on Jen’s clothing, casting “hinkey” votes and at our beck and call. Yes, instead of Eric in the DR, raising his eyebrow and getting his orders from America, it could have been Dan in the DR, over projecting his voice and heeding our wishes.

The Big Brother player who has turned the house upside down this week, actually first applied to be on the show two years ago, according to an interview with his sister, Kelly. The producers actually asked him to be on the show two or three times, but he turned it down because the timing wasn’t right for him and he wanted to finish college.

Had he actually accepted sooner, maybe things could have been different last summer. Click here to read the full article.

Sheila Does A Zach – Big Brother 9 Week 11 HOH

James is officially out of the Big Brother house, and once again the best competitor in a season has not won the game. Keep in mind that I’m not counting Dick and Daniele, since the general American public had a part in getting them to the end, even though they were pretty good competitors. But even if we brought them into the argument we’d have say Daniele was the best competitor and she came in second, which is still losing.

Anyway, since we’re referencing season 8, remember when Zach turned it on and surprised everyone in that tea transferring endurance competition? Well, it seems that Sheila might be doing the same thing this season. She outlasted everyone last night in the boxed in competition. Granted, it seemed like she was pretty much given the victory but it’s still a win nevertheless. Could this be the start of a dominant win streak by the mom of the house? I doubt it. But its nice to see her get a victory under her belt.

Word is she’ll nominate Sharon and Adam. We’ll let you know who actually gets nominated when it happens so check back often for the update.